Someone to Watch Over Me (Bow Street Runners Series, Book One): Lisa Kleypas *UPDATED*

 This is another re-read of an old book in my personal collection.  Unfortunately, I'm not entirely certain when I finished reading it for the second time, but I do know it was after I gave birth to my son, but before the end of 2019.  I'm going to estimate it was in early December of 2019.  This review was penned on May 19, 2020, so please forgive me if it's not my most elaborate.  You can find my original review of this book HERE.  The review dates all the way back to 2008, so I wouldn't really recommend it...it's far too vague and brief to be of much good to anyone.

I seem to have enjoyed this book less than I did the first time around.  Maybe it's because I'm more jaded from the last 12 years, or maybe because I am mature enough to recognize just how unhealthy the relationship between Grant and Vivien really is...  There is something to be said for a man wanting revenge, but I feel like Grant's reaction was a bit disproportionate to the slight he received at the hands of Vivien.  As he continues to press forward with his plans, I didn't find it sexy or romantic...I found it borderline reprehensible.  I didn't see love blossoming; I saw fascination and obsession.  Grant set out to do something vile and I think that made me take a step back from his character.  Because of this, I found myself less attracted to him than I should have been, given the genre of this book.  We readers are supposed to fall in love with the male leads in these books, but I fell short of that with Grant.  Sure, his character was flawed (and I DO really love a well-written, flaw-inducing backstory), but not always in a way that made him charming or attractive.  I got glimpses of what he could have been, but I never, ever really felt much for him as a character.  Aside from his revenge plot, I think part of the problem was that we didn't really get to experience much of what made him unique.  We know more about him from accounts given by other characters.  I wanted him to be more fleshed out by his own actions, hobbies, hopes, dreams, etc.

Where do I start with Vivien?  I KNOW she doesn't remember who she is or what her life was like before she was attacked; however, she fell short for me as well.  She was so accepting of Grant's stories and was relatively acquiescent when it came to her belief that he'd want to share her bed because, as he'd said, they were in a relationship.  I found it less than believable.  A true, strong female lead would never have allowed it -- would never have just taken his word for it -- not when she thinks over and over again how wrong it feels and foreign the notion is to her.

One of the biggest issues I encountered was I couldn't put my finger on WHY Grant and Vivien fell in love.  They were attracted to one another, to be sure, but Grant didn't actually know anything about Vivien...and we saw so few personal details about Grant.  Though I finished the book rather quickly and I can appreciate the plot twists and the ending, I think some of the components fell short.  Lisa Kleypas has written some wonderful books, but this older one just did not resonate as much with me anymore.

When Maidens Mourn (Sebastian St. Cyr Series, Book Seven): C.S. Harris

"Tales of King Arthur and the Lady of Shalott provide inspiration for this latest gripping installment in the Sebastian St. Cyr mystery series.  Just four days wed, the aristocratic investigator and his fiercely independent bride, Hero Jarvis, become caught up in a twisted intrigue involving ancient legends and a deadly family curse.

"Regency England, August 1812:  Sebastian's plans to escape the heat of London for a honeymoon are shattered when the murdered body of Hero's good friend Gabrielle Tennyson is discovered drifting in a battered boat at the site of a long-vanished castle known as Camlet Moat.  A beautiful young antiquary, Miss Tennyson recently provoked an uproar with her controversial identification of the island as the location of Camelot.  Missing and presumed dead are also Gabrielle's two young cousins, nine-year-old George and three-year-old Alfred.

"Still struggling to define the nature of their new marriage, Sebastian and Hero find themselves occasionally working at cross-purposes as their investigation takes them from London's medieval Inns of Court to its grimy back alleys, and from a newly built country estate to a rural enclave where ancient Celtic beliefs still hold sway.  Probing deeper, Sebastian discovers dark secrets at the heart of the Tennyson family and an enigmatic young French lieutenant who is concealing mysteries of his own.

"As Sebastian and Hero race to unmask a ruthless killer and unravel the puzzle of the missing children, they soon realize that both their lives and the growing love for each other are at risk, threatened by powerful men in high places...and by a tall, dark stranger who may hold the key to Sebastian's own parentage."

This is, unfortunately, another severely delayed review.  I finished reading this book in August of 2019 and, as I mentioned in another review I just posted, I was so frustrated with myself for having accidentally deleted a rather lengthy review that I simply stopped reviewing my books as I read them (that, and I was extremely distracted because we were also purchasing a new home and I was 6 months pregnant in August!).  *Edit:  I was able to figure out how to backdate my review to post on the correct date that I finished this book; the review was written on May 19, 2020.

This was a fitting installment in the Sebastian St. Cyr series of period mysteries.  As always, Harris did not disappoint with her rich, captivating narrative and complex plot.  She remained true to her brilliant, headstrong characters and darkly twisted mystery.  I was exited to see Arthurian mythology playing a prominent role in this particular story.  As a bit of a British literature and history buff, I don't think we see much of an acknowledgment of this in popular literature (unless someone blatantly chooses to write about it with characters and plots specifically set within said mythology).  I even once wrote an entire presentation on the importance of the Arthurian legend in British culture -- specifically how King Arthur makes a resurgence in times of need and strife.  He represents a very specific brand of nationalism (and this happens to tie in perfectly with the plot of this particular book!).  I loved how much this came into play - not only with Gabrielle's claims that Camlet is THE Camelot, but with the mystery surrounding the circumstances of her death.

The plot takes you in a winding journey from suspect to suspect - each seemingly more guilty than the last.  All the while, the simmering tension and desire between Sebastian and Hero is at war with their respective desires to be "in charge."  Each is brilliant in his/her own right, yet they cannot seem to let go of the longstanding battle of wills that stands between them.  As they attempt to work together to solve this mystery, they discover the growing strength of their own relationship and fresh marriage.  This presents a nice undertone to the mystery and tragic murder of Hero's friend.

In this case, solving the murder is not enough.  There is still the matter of the missing boys.  Who has the means and motive to kill the intelligent young woman and kidnap her cousins?  What role does the dashing Frenchman play in all of this?  Could a jealous relative be behind the murder, or is there something much larger at play here?  Could Hero's father have been behind it all along?  If so, what does that mean for the relationship between Hero and Sebastian; or Hero and her father, for that matter?

Another undercurrent in this book is the mystery surrounding Sebastian's true parentage.  We encounter a very intriguing stranger who may just have all the answers -- if he was willing to talk...

The multifaceted nature of this story (in fact, the entire series) makes for a very compelling read.  The period nature of this plot creates a dark and gritty (almost gothic) setting, perfect for those of us who have an interest in period literature.  The characters are all richly crafted and the mysteries are complex and keep you guessing until the very end.  Overall, I am still thrilled with this series and look forward to moving to the next one.

The Temptation of Your Touch (Burke Brothers, Book Two): Teresa Medeiros

"A new enchanting historical romance from a 'superb storyteller' (Booklist) and New York Times bestselling author featuring a handsome, brooding Earl who finds himself drawn to his prim and proper housekeeper.

"Maximillian Burke has always prided himself on being the man that every mother would want her daughter to marry.  But after his scoundrel of a brother makes off with Max's bride, Max discovers it's more satisfying to be a rogue than the perfect gentleman.  Forced to flee London after a duel gone wrong, he seeks refuge at Cadgwyck Manor on the lonely coast of Cornwall, a place as wild and savage as his current temper.  The tumbledown manor comes complete with its own ghost but oddly enough, it's not the White Lady of Cadgwyck who haunts Max's heated dreams - but his no-nonsense housekeeper.  The last thing Anne Spencer needs is a new master, especially one as brooding and gorgeous as the Earl of Dravenwood.  Even as she schemes to be rid of her new employer, she finds herself irresistibly drawn into his strong, muscular arms.  When Mac vows to solve the mystery of Cadgwyk's ghost, he doesn't realize it will put both of their hearts at risk and tempt them to surrender to a pleasure as delicious as it is dangerous."

This is yet another after-the-fact review.  Unfortunately, I don't have the exact date I finished this book, but I believe I'd already finished it before the end of June of 2019.  This review was penned on May 19, 2020, so please forgive it's brevity as I do my best to do it justice so long after I finished reading it.

I thoroughly enjoyed the first book in this series and was so looking forward to the second that I immediately began reading it.  Max's character changed quite a bit from the first book.  Gone was the totally level-headed, staid man of the first book; in his place was a more emotional, angrier one.  He'd lost out on a woman he cared for, and cut off his brother in the process.  Max felt betrayed and he lashed out quite a bit, even causing a scene in London Society which created the need for some time out of the limelight.  He purchased a new, far-flung estate in Cornwall and retreats there to get away.  Little does he know what he is about to encounter...  Not only do the villagers seem terrified of his new manor, he finds it rather rundown, understaffed, and the hodgepodge of those willing to work there, quite odd, to say the least.  The one he finds most intriguing is his pretty housekeeper, Anne.  There's something about her attitude, her confidence, and her wit that intrigue him.  Max, however, can be just as intelligent, and he quickly catches onto the fact that he is not wanted at Cadgwyck Manor.  The staff seems to be doing whatever they can to make his stay miserable.  He doesn't think things can get worse, until the White Lady begins to make her presence known...  Max knows there must be something more to his "haunted" manor than meets the eye.  When he finally learns the story behind the ghostly apparition, he cannot help but be enthralled by the stunningly beautiful woman whose painting graces one of the walls, and he yearns to know more about her.

Anne is determined to be rid of the Max.  She and her friends have successfully run off a number of would-be owners in the past; how difficult could one more be?  She didn't count on a new master as intelligent, brave, stubborn, and handsome as Max.  She remains determined to maintain her freedom and run the manor as she sees fit, but Max does not seem to want to cooperate.  Drastic times call for drastic measures...only the more time Anne spends with Max, the harder it is for her to want to see him leave.  She struggles to keep him at arm's length when all she wants is to feel his touch.  The undeniable spark between them could be catastrophic if Max is allowed to snoop around the manor..and learn Anne's darkest secret...

Cornwall seems to be a favorite of Medeiros for creating ghostly, eerie settings -- I can clearly recall at least one other book set in Cornwall with similar ghostly tales swirling about.  I supposed I can't blame her.  The gloomy area and spooky moors create the perfect atmosphere for the supernatural.  It also happens to personify Max's moods quite well -- perfect for the brooding male lead.

The secondary characters were wonderfully lively and lent some fun to the plot.  The story could have turned far too dark and brooding, but they helped keep it light and airy.  This makes for a good contrast between the seriousness of the haunted manor and the very realistic relationships between the characters.

It was entertaining to watch all of the characters develop over the course of the book.  Max and Anne had a lovely relationship and I truly did enjoy this book.  The passion was sizzling and the overall story was extremely well-written.  I did not see the plot twist until it was staring me in the face!  Kudos to Medeiros because I think it was handled brilliantly and it was extremely creative.

I definitely recommend this book, as well as its earlier counterpart.  As much as I enjoyed the first, I think this one was my favorite of the two; I think a lot of this had to do with the fact that there was more equality in the narratives of Max and Anne -- it did not feel as one-sided.  Happy reading!

I Know Who You Are: Alice Feeney

"Meet Aimee Sinclair, the actress everyone thinks they know but can't remember how.

"Except one person.

"Someone knows Aimee very well.

"They know who she is and they know what she did.

"When Aimee comes home and discovers her husband is missing, she doesn't seem to know what to do or how to act.  The police think she's hiding something and they're right, she is--but perhaps not what they thought.  Aimee has a secret she's never shared, and yet she suspects that someone knows.  As she struggles to keep her career and sanity intact, her past comes back to haunt her in ways more dangerous than she could have ever imagined.

"In I Know Who You Are, New York Times bestselling author Alice Feeney proves that she is a master of brilliantly complicated plots and killer twists that will keep you guessing until the final page."

I'm baaaaack!  I've been on a hiatus for what feels like forever and, for that, I apologize.  If I'm totally honest, it began because I originally wrote a spectacular review of this book in June of 2019...and accidentally deleted it instead of saving it.  Stupid me.  And there was no recovering it because I had written it on a computer without automatic backup.  Ugh.  I'm still annoyed by that to this day; however, I think my extreme disgust and quick temper had something to do with the fact that I was also four months pregnant.  Yes!  We have a new little reader in our household!  My son, J, is just over six months old now and I've been reading to him to show him how amazing the written word can be.  I hope he's going to be a little bibliophile, just like his Mommy.

Now, back to the review...  I'm going to attempt to recreate some of my review of this book, but I'm positive it's going to pale in comparison to the real thing simply because it's been so darn long since I read it.  I'm a bit frustrated that I've completely thrown off my book count for 2019 and 2020 because I stopped reviewing what I was reading, but such is life.  *Edit:  I was able to figure out how to backdate this review to when I originally finished reading it.  This review was written on May 19, 2020.

When re-reading the synopsis of this book, the first thing that struck me was how amazingly twisted it was.  Feeney's writing left such an impression on me that, even nearly a year later, I recall how gut-wrenchingly shocking her writing was.  Similar to her other book Sometimes I Lie, the book starts off compelling, but rather ordinary.  The characters are interesting and the plot is unique, but you wonder where everything is going.  It's a brilliant mixture of familiarity and suspense - if that makes any sense at all?  We begin with the disappearance of Aimee's husband.  It's interesting and suspenseful, but I've learned to expect more from Feeney.  What dark and twisty turns await the readers?  Hm.  The cops seem to lay an extreme amount of suspicion at Aimee's feet.  In fact, some hints and clues make the readers doubt Aimee as well.  What is her secret?  What does want to keep in the dark?  For that matter, who is this woman she claims to have stalking her?  A crazed fan?  Something more?  Could this woman be responsible for everything that's going on?  What could she possibly want with Aimee?

And when we finally learn more about Aimee's past - her deep, dark secrets - we realize that there's more to her character than meets the eye.  The revelation brings to light a great deal of what makes up Aimee's inability to share herself...and the possibility that she may very well have blocked out some very important information.  In an attempt to try not to reveal too much, I will say that her childhood is every parent's worst nightmare...

Then, when the ending comes about, we are exposed to the psychological havoc that abuse can wreak upon a person's psyche - just how damaged they become when their formative years are devoid of love and nurturing attention.  I found the culmination of all of the suspense nothing less than shocking.  Feeney is truly a master of dark suspense and psychological thrillers.  She has shed light upon the dingiest corners of the human mind and exposed characters who are the epitome of damaged.  This book left an indelible mark upon me.

I will caution readers who are easily disturbed by rape and child abuse to steer clear of this book.  Even though I found the story highly disturbing, it was a story I simply could not put down.  If you love twisted suspense, then this book is definitely for you.

The Pleasure of Your Kiss (Burke Brothers: Book One): Teresa Medeiros

“Legendary adventurer Ashton Burke has roamed the globe for ten years trying to forget the spirited woman he left behind in England.  His devil-may-care pursuits are interrupted, though, when he reluctantly agrees to retrieve his brother’s kidnapped fiancé from a sultan’s harem.  Too late, he discovers his quarry is none other than Clarinda Cardew, the very same girl who made off with his jaded heart.

“The last thing Clarinda wants is to be trapped in a palace of sensual delights with the man whose irresistible kisses still haunt her sleepless nights.  She quickly realizes that allowing Ashton to rescue her may put her yearning heart in even greater peril.  In a journey both tantalizing and treacherous, Ashton and Clarinda resume the impetuous steps of their dangerous dance only to discover the most seductive pleasure of all may be love itself.”

This was a new one for me since I’ve already read a majority of this author’s other works.  One of the best parts of her works is the worlds she creates.  She really draws you in with vivid imagery and experiences which enthrall all of your senses.  I hadn’t yet read a book of this genre set in such a far-flung corner of the British Empire, so I wasn’t sure what to expect.  For me, part of the charm is usually losing myself in the elegance and beauty of England/Great Britain because I’m such an Anglophile.  Despite my reservations, I was sucked into the lush and exotic world of Clarinda’s kidnappers.  The palace and its luxuries with its foreign ways and manners and food captivated me.  All of the secondary characters were interesting and unique, each with his/her own big personality.  The uniqueness of the setting made this book fun and special, allowing it to stand out in a genre of relative sameness when set during this time period.  It provided an exciting backdrop for the development of a unique love story.

Clarinda was a strong, brave female lead.  I thought she behaved admirably well given her lot in life (and her kidnapping…and having to adjust to life in the harem).  Her struggles felt believable and her backstory seemed to provide enough support that her strong personality was in-character.  Her friendship with Poppy was entertaining and provided a bit of levity in a situation where the female lead could have given in to far too much despair and hopelessness so as to make this a much less “fun” read.  I particularly liked Poppy as well – she had a sweet disposition and an innocence which I found endearing.

Ash(ton) was everything you’d expect from a swashbuckling, exploring, Indiana Jones-esque male lead.  We encounter him just as he’s about to be put to death for a perceived slight against a very powerful man, only to have his life saved at the very last instant.  When the reason for the timely rescue becomes apparent, Ash isn’t so sure he’d rather not have perished by the firing squad.  He’s sent on a mission to save the last woman on earth who’d probably rather he’d died than rescue her.  His struggle to come to terms with both his past and present were amusing and realistic.  Ash, while dashing and adventurous, had a bit more to him than a “flat” traditional male lead in this genre.  He came with his own issues and complexes.  What I found particularly interesting was the change in relationship between Ash and his brother, Max.  The backstory and Ash’s childhood speaks volumes to his character and seems to have helped shape him in a believable way.  I will, however, say that I would have liked to have read a touch more from his point of view.  He’s such a bold, exciting character that I couldn’t help but want more!  I think Clarinda’s perspective ended up swallowing most of the story.

Ash and Clarinda have loved each other for most of their lives.  They grew up on neighboring estates; Ash, a duke’s second (disappointment of a) son, and Clarinda, the daughter of a wealthy, self-made man.  What began as a childhood rivalry eventually blossomed into a passionate young romance.  Ash, determined to make his way in the world – determined to make something of himself so he’d be worthy of Clarinda rather than just an impoverished second son – decides to join the navy.  Horrified that he’d think of leaving her, Clarinda chases after him.  What begins with tears and hurt ends in a passionate embrace the two would remember for the rest of their lives.  The years pass and Clarinda sees neither hide nor hair of Ash (except for the tabloids detailing his heroic adventures).  Convinced he’s abandoned her, she finally decides to accept the marriage proposal of Max, Ash’s older brother – wealthy, stable, staid, intelligent, and ever-practical.  She’s on her way to meet Max for their wedding when she and Poppy are abducted by pirates and sold in a slave market into the harem of an obscenely wealthy, handsome young sultan.  While there, Clarinda is groomed and trained in all the ways of the sultan’s harem.  After months, she and Poppy begin to despair of ever being rescued and returned home…that is, until a dashing ghost from Clarinda’s past makes a surprise appearance.

What follows is a tantalizing romance of opposing wills.  Both Ash and Clarinda are nursing old wounds, but still find themselves drawn toward one another by a powerful force that seems to transcend time and distance.  Will Ash be able to save Clarinda from the sultan’s harem and deliver her back to his brother?  For that matter, how can he stand by and allow his brother to marry the one and only woman he’d ever truly loved?

I found the plot entertaining and very fun and different from others in this genre/time period.  It was refreshing!  I enjoyed reading this and it was a relatively quick read.  I’ve already begun reading the second in this series and it’s shaping up to be another lively read!

Where Shadows Dance (Sebastian St. Cyr Mystery, Book Six): C. S. Harris

“Regency London, July 1812:  How do you set about solving a murder that no one can reveal has been committed?

“That’s the challenge confronting C. S. Harris’s aristocratic soldier-turned-sleuth, Sebastian St. Cyr, when surgeon and anatomist Paul Gibson illegally buys the cadaver of a young man from London’s infamous body snatchers.  A rising star at the Foreign Office, Mr. Alexander Ross was reported to have died of a weak heart.  But when Gibson discovers a stiletto wound at the base of Ross’s skill, he can turn only to Sebastian for help in catching the killer.

“Described by all who knew him as an amiable young man, Ross at first seems an unlikely candidate for murder.  But as Sebastian’s search takes him from the Queen’s drawing rooms in St. James’s Palace to the embassies of Russia, the United States, and the Turkish Empire, he plunges into a dangerous shadow land of diplomatic maneuvering and international intrigue, where truth is an elusive commodity and nothing is as it seems.

“Meanwhile, Sebastian must confront the turmoil of his personal life.  Hero Jarvis, daughter of his powerful nemesis Lord Jarvis, finally agrees to become his wife.  But as their wedding approaches, Sebastian can’t escape the growing realization that not only Lord Jarvis but Hero herself knows far more about the events surrounding Ross’s death than they would have him believe.

“Then a second body is found, badly decomposed but bearing the same fatal stiletto wound.  And Sebastian must race to unmask a ruthless killer who is now threatening the life of his reluctant bride and their unborn child.”

This installment in the world of Sebastian St. Cyr mysteries was one of my quicker reads by Harris.  I thought the plot twists and sheer number of suspects did a very good job of keeping the truth behind the murder of Alexander Ross well hidden from the readers, as well as ensuring a good pace to the plot.

Sebastian is called to Gibson’s surgery after the anatomist discovers a very suspicious wound inflicted upon a corpse which he obtained through dubious means.  Little does Sebastian know that investigating the hidden murder will not only reveal massive secrets within the government, but it also puts Sebastian’s own life at stake, and that of those he cares about.

Still struggling to come to terms with the fact that Hendon is not his true father, Sebastian remains firm in his resolve that he’ll not allow his own child to suffer the stain of illegitimacy – he finally convinces Hero Jarvis to accept his hand in marriage, much to the chagrin of both their families at odds over politics and personal vendettas.  Unfortunately for Hero, tying her name to a well-known aristocratic sleuth means she becomes a target for those trying to dissuade and distract Sebastian from his meddlesome crime-solving.  Sebastian must manage his perceptive, nosy, hesitant-bride-to-be all while ensuring his own hide is kept safe as he skillfully maneuvers between social and political circles.  Diplomats, shipping magnates, ambassadors, military notables, foreign spies, and even the Undersecretary of Foreign Affairs all rank somewhere amongst his seemingly-endless list of suspects.  He discovers there are far more lies, subterfuge, and exchanges of gold and secrets taking place within the Regency government and between England and other Continental nations during this tumultuous wartime.  But which of his suspects is the most likely to have wanted Ross – a seemingly well-liked gentleman professional, loyal to both his government and his lovely young betrothed – dead?  And what do the United States have to do with all of it?  Whoever it was nearly got away with the murder…had it not been for Gibson and his body-snatching contacts.

As the bodies begin to pile up, Sebastian must determine which – if any – of them are related…and figure out just how many killers are out there before time runs out.  The ensuing manhunt risks Sebastian’s life and the stability of his own country’s government.

I found this book to be intriguing and entertaining.  It is, of course, another murder-mystery, so it is certainly not without its gruesome gore.  This is another book that’s not for the faint-of-heart or weak-of-stomach.  The violence and death aren’t gratuitous, just a present aspect of this series and genre – I just wanted to provide fair warning so you’ll know what you’re getting into!  I didn’t see the ending until it exploded right in front of me.  The twists and turns kept the author’s aim well disguised and made me want to keep on reading.  The only shortcoming to this was that I don’t feel like I really, truly appreciated Sebastian’s brilliance in this book.  The beauty of the other books was watching his mind work out the murders and leads.  It’s clear that Harris is capable of revealing just enough to keep the readers guessing because this is what she managed to do with the other books in this series.  For this book, all the pieces seemed to fall into place after the fact, so it almost felt too convenient or the thought process too hidden to actually appreciate from my standpoint.  This means that this book was not my favorite one in this series, though I did still enjoy it.  I like the rollercoaster I experience while reading these books and following Sebastian’s investigations, but I wanted to feel more “involved” than I did while reading this installment.

I look forward to watching the characters’ various relationships develop:  Sebastian and Hero, Hendon and Sebastian, Sebastian and Lord Jarvis, even Sebastian and Kat (who was, for the most part, very absent from this book).  One of the greatest successes of this series is Harris’s ability to weave together hints of romance and very personal emotions with the murder-mystery.

Happy reading!

Laughing IS Conceivable: One Woman's Extremely Funny Peek into the Extremely Unfunny World of Infertility: Lori Shandle-Fox

"This little ebook was written by a humor writer and former stand-up comic while she was in the shoes of her one fertility treatments -- uncertain of the outcome.  It has been downloaded by 1000s of fertility patients and professionals who believe that, even in this overwhelming, emotionally, mentally, financially, & physically draining time in a person's life, laughter really is the best medicine."


***I FINALLY get to post this review!  I originally wrote it on 12/18/17 and now, on 6/7/2019, I am finally allowed to post it!  When I read this book about a year-and-a-half ago, I had no idea I'd have to postpone this review for such a long time.  I picked it up right after we were told that the next step in our fertility process was IVF...and I was devastated.  I felt so broken, so useless, and so lost.  Why was conceiving no problem for so many and yet I was "unworthy"?  I was desperate (as was my husband) to find some way to cope with this all while maintaining the level of privacy I/we wanted to maintain throughout this infertility process.  This book is marketed to women in my situation.  Re-reading my review below, I didn't seem all that impressed.  I think, perhaps, I wasn't in a very receptive place (I was just downright angry and miserable), or maybe it was because I hadn't actually begun my own IVF process yet.  We didn't start prepping until early 2018 for what would turn into 2 IVF egg retrieval cycles.  Recalling what I do about this book, I think I would have appreciated some of it a lot more had I been going through IVF -- I don't know if I would have cracked up like some of the other readers did, but maybe I would have connected on a different level.  The book did do one thing:  it helped me not feel so alone.  I wasn't the only woman suffering through this and I won't be the last.  If you're more of a private person (like myself) and/or you don't have anyone close to you with whom you can share this experience or who can connect with you, then this is a good place to start.  It may help you feel just a little less lost and a little less hopeless.  Here is what I wrote back in 2017:

I’m planning on keeping this review private for the foreseeable future, mostly because reviewing this short book is a very personal revelation.  I picked up a little postcard advertising this book while in the waiting room at my fertility doctor’s office.  My husband and I have been trying to conceive since our wedding 1.5 years ago, but no luck.  I had a surprise PCOS diagnosis 1 year ago and, after countless tests, a surgery, monitoring, and numerous procedures, still no luck.  The last couple of months have been particularly stressful and painful for me and it seems only to be getting worse.  My poor, distraught husband has asked me to speak to someone about our difficulties in the hopes that it would make me feel better – for many reasons, I/we have decided to keep these issues private, if only to save ourselves from having to discuss every individual failure each and every time.  I feel it’s a very private matter and it’s no one else’s business.  Anyway, this book is supposed to be geared toward women in my situation; it’s marketed as having a sense of humor about the whole issue of infertility and all the crap we have to go through just to try to accomplish something our female bodies are supposed to do naturally.  Speaking first-hand, I can say this is a very personal, very raw, very difficult topic.  I was hoping that this book would do exactly what it was intended to do:  add some levity to the very serious and often heartbreaking situation of infertility.

This was a very quick read – much quicker than I thought it would be…I read it in less than 24 hours.  It was easy to read and well-organized.  While I found my mouth twitching at some of the scenarios and I highlighted several very relatable passages, it was not the crack-me-up, laugh-out-loud book I was hoping for.  Reading reviews on Amazon, it seems like the reviews are, for the most part, on very opposite sides of this spectrum.  People either cried from laughing so much, or they found it boring and filled with complaints rather than anything helpful or uplifting.  I am one of the rare middle-gounders.  I can sincerely appreciate what the author was trying to do.  It was reassuring to know I wasn’t alone in this (though I knew I never actually was, it was a way of seeing into someone else’s journey without feeling nosey or having to explain my own issues to put us on equal ground).  I didn’t crack up.  I think the closest I got was a small chuckle.  I think this could have been a much longer book; especially because it seemed like the author underwent a lot of treatment.  I get that it’s her choice to include as many or as few of her experiences as she wants, but I was given the impression that the book, itself, would have been longer.  I think it would have been more “helpful” had it been longer because she could have included more of her trials.  Maybe that’s just me.

Would I recommend this book?  I suppose.  I can see how it might help some women/people going through similar situations.  It does remind you that you're not alone, you're not the only one experiencing these feelings and this pain, but I did not experience the same solace other readers felt.  I say give it a go if you want!  Who knows?  Maybe it'll help you more than it helped me.  Happy reading (and good luck to all)!

What Remains of Heaven (Sebastian St. Cyr Mystery, Book Five): C. S. Harris

“The latest request for help from Sebastian St. Cyr, Viscount Devlin—from the Archbishop of Canterbury, no less—is undeniably intriguing:  The bodies of two men have been found in an ancient crypt, their violent deaths separated by decades.  One is the Bishop of London, the elderly Archbishop’s favored but controversial successor.  The identity of the other seems lost in time, although his faded velvet attire marks him as a gentleman of the eighteenth century.

 

“To Sebastian’s consternation, the last person to see the Bishop alive was none other than Miss Hero Jarvis, a woman whose already strained relationship with St. Cyr has been complicated by a brief, unexpectedly passionate encounter.  Not only that, but it soon becomes obvious that her powerful father had reasons of his own for wanting the Bishop out of the way.  In an investigation that leads from the back alleys of Smithfield to the power corridors of Whitehall, Sebastian amasses a list of suspects that ranges from some of the Prince Regent’s closest cronies to William Franklin, embittered son of famous American patriot Ben Franklin.

“Then the second corpse is identified, and Sebastian finds himself confronting the well-guarded secrets of his own family’s history.  Now each step he takes toward the killer brings him closer to a devastating truth that could ultimately force him to question who – and what – he really is.”

Here's my last belated May review!  It feels so good to be caught up again!

I seem to be on a bit of a C.S. Harris kick lately – not that this is a bad thing, but I typically try to “mix it up” more than I have been.  I think I’m going to have to force myself to branch out and find some more reading materials and new authors.  If I’m smart about it, I’ll start compiling a list of new and interesting books and authors because I will be going on maternity leave in a few months (yay!) and there’s a chance it could be sooner with my medical history, so I’ll have to find a way to occupy myself so I don’t go stir-crazy waiting for baby boy to arrive.  What better way to pass the enforced downtime than putting my feet up and enjoying the escape into some amazing books?

Now, to the review:  As usual, C.S. Harris enthralls and entertains with her dark (and sometimes disturbing) Regency murder-mysteries and her captivating hero, Devlin.  Still mourning the loss of his love, Kat, Sebastian struggles to come to terms with his new existence – little does he know that life as he knows it is about to be dealt an even more crippling blow as he dives into the investigation of the murders in a country crypt.

I feel I must issue a warning.  While all of the books in this series involve horrible murders and some gruesome autopsies, I admit that I found this book to be particularly off-putting when I attempted to read it during my lunch breaks at the office…  The repeated descriptions of the mummified cadavers in the crypt – while brilliantly done in vivid detail – were stomach-turning (and I really cannot blame it on my slightly weakened pregnancy tummy).  All I mean to say is that you should be forewarned.  This book is not for the faint of heart or weak of stomach (and I like to think I’m not particularly squeamish).  If you can get past this, then the rest of the book is quite interesting.

As usual, Devlin is a fascinating, intelligent investigator.  He doesn’t allow threats to deter him from his mission, no matter that his own life may be at risk.  His inquiries seem to take him all over London and the countryside as he tracks a seemingly endless list of suspects.  His investigations uncover the hidden past of a seemingly-Godly bishop, the depravity and general dislike toward the man who is now the murdered corpse in the crypt, and a dark secret from Devlin’s own family history.  Aided by Paul Gibson and his urchin-turned-tiger, Tom, Devlin doggedly follows his leads, all while dodging a man from his past who seeks vengeance against Devlin for a perceived slight when they were both in the army.  He also (somewhat reluctantly) seeks out the assistance of Hero Jarvis, though he knows doing so might very well endanger the investigation when her own father is on his list of suspects.  Doing so brings him closer to Hero…and to the realization that she may be keeping a very, very big secret from him.

What Devlin discovers about the murders involves old family secrets, the American Revolution, and the determination to keep those secrets hidden, no matter the cost.  What comes to light not only changes Devlin’s life, but the lives of those around him in irrevocable ways.

I enjoyed the suspense and the many twists and turns of this story.  Devlin, as per usual, is a captivating lead.  He’s intelligent, intense, flawed, and charming.  His sense of right and wrong is like his religion, something he seeks out with such fervor that it spurs him on when other, weaker men might have given up or refused to continue on.  The settings are vivid and the story is fast-paced and wildly interesting.  I didn’t see the ending until it hit me in the face.

Not to give away any spoilers, but I am pleased that Devlin finally learned about his family’s big secret – we readers have been privy for some time now and I am extremely interested to see where this takes Devlin.

After Midnight (Lords of Midnight, Book One): Teresa Medeiros *UPDATED*

“The eldest and most sensible of the three Cabot siblings, Caroline is naturally concerned that her sister Vivienne has lately been keeping company with the infamous Adrian Kane, Viscount Trevelyan, the enigmatic nobleman whom most of the ton firmly believe is…a vampire!  Surely, it is nonsense.  And yet…  The brooding gentleman inhabits a dark castle and is never seen in the daylight, embarking nightly on mysterious excursions to who knows where.  And from the first moment Caroline encounters the handsome, hypnotically compelling viscount, she is shaken by a fevered desire for the man that borders on the unnatural.  She must know Adrian’s secrets!  But each step that draws the inquisitive beauty deeper into his shadowy world pulls her closer to a sensuous surrender, for the power of his passion is impossible to resist.  Is he man or monster, champion or villain?  And will a yearning heart lead Caroline to disaster…or to love?”

 

Here's another May read I've finally managed to review!  And it's a re-read!  You can find my original (rather horrible) review of this book from August of 2008 HERE.

 

Caroline is driven by a fierce determination to see her younger sisters safe and secure, even if it means sacrificing her own food, clothing, and happiness.  After the death of their parents, she takes over the care and management of her siblings and does everything within her meager power to keep them safe and comfortable.  Her own dreams and ambitions are put on hold so that her sisters might have a better chance at making it out in the world.  Vivienne even inherits the beautiful clothes and adornments that were meant for Caroline’s own coming-out.  While in Town, Vivienne meets and, apparently, captivates one very mysterious suitor.  Viscount Trevelyn has a dark and mysterious reputation, but this does not seem to deter Vivienne’s aims to marry him.  The youngest Cabot sister, however, feels very differently.  Portia has always been flighty and prone to fantasy.  When she discovers Vivienne is being courted by a man purported to be a vampire…well, that sets her imagination aflame.  Caroline must juggle keeping Portia in line and ensuring Vivienne is happy with the match (because, surely, vampires are not real).  She doesn’t, however, take into account her own feelings.  The first time she meets the intensely-handsome, golden-haired viscount, she does not realize to whom she is speaking.  She finds herself inexplicably drawn to him and his sense of humor.  Little does she know, she’s enchanted by the very man her sister is to wed.  As they grow closer, Caroline and Adrian are playing a very dangerous game.  She gets to know Adrian and, rather than have her questions answered, a Pandora’s Box seems to be opened and she’s swallowed by his dark, mysterious world.  Could her sanity be slipping, or is there a very real possibility that the rumors about Adrian could be true?  Could he really be a vampire?  Or does he shield darker secrets from the prying eyes of the ton?

 

I enjoyed this book very much the first time around almost 11 years ago (wow, I cannot believe it’s been that long!) and I did like it this go as well; however, perhaps not as much.  I wasn’t as sucked in as I was last time.  I don’t know if I should attribute this to the fact that I knew to expect the twists and turns, or because it’s not as fantastic as I’d once believed it to be.  Don’t get me wrong, I still very much enjoyed the style of writing and the characters.  I think the difference probably lies in my tastes.  This is a more traditional vampire story and I tend to stay away from these.  If this is something more to your tastes, then you’ll likely enjoy it more than I did.  Its best qualities are probably the surprises.  It’s not as straightforward a plot as you might first believe!  Medeiros is artful in her stealthy approach, carefully crafting a storyline that will keep you interested:  not everything is as it seems.

 

As for the characters, themselves:  I feel like we got to know Caroline much more than Adrian.  For me, books of this genre suffer a bit when this happens.  We female readers are supposed to fall for the male leads.  When they’re less-developed, this becomes more difficult to accomplish.  We learn snippets about Adrian’s past, but the biggest focus is his relationship with his younger brother, Julian.  This redeemed his development somewhat, but I found it a bit lacking.  Most of what we come to know about him is secondhand rather than from Adrian’s own memories or emotions.  I wanted just a bit more from him and I probably would have been more satisfied had I gotten it.  I realize a lot of this had to do with the fact that Medeiros needed to keep us in the dark about various plot twists, but I feel like more could have been revealed once these twists finally came to fruition.

 

Caroline has a much better-formed backstory.  I appreciated her tenacity and self-sacrifice.  She was a young woman bent on doing whatever it took to take care of her sisters and I definitely admired this.  However, this did not make her a pure, flawless character, which I appreciated.  I don’t like when characters are too perfect, and I think most of you will agree with me.  There have to be some imperfections or they don’t feel real enough.  The fact that she began to fall for her sister’s intended was certainly a flaw and her struggle made her more likable.

 

I liked this book and will probably reread the second in the series as well.  If you’re a fan of vampire romances and period romances, then this one will be right up your alley.